IT’S ALWAYS AN INSIDE JOB
I don’t use the word always and never very often – always fits with this idea. Whatever your deal – problem, issue, trouble – the answer or solution is “always an inside job.” At least to some degree. I haven’t applied this idea to every possible situation, so there may be areas where it won’t fit. There is one for sure – children. Children depend on their parents or caregivers. They are without power and resources within their control. They often have easier access to their “insides” and less ability to manage what is outside themselves.
Figuring out yourself, your part of a problem, or how you can respond is powerful. This is where the power over your own life is active. Focusing on what someone else does or is doing to you or the outside circumstances you’re in, drain you. You may need to evaluate the situation but playing it over and over in your head uses a lot of energy and does not affect change.
I can’t control the weather. I can decide if today is a good day to plant the garden, paint the deck, or read a book. I can only do so much to get my Jeep started and then it’s time for the tow truck and my mechanic. When people get angry about little stuff, I can engage with them or just walk away. I prefer the latter most the time.
And then there is the big stuff – a diagnosis, a death, a pandemic. I choose how I respond and work within what is. Even with the big stuff there is always something I can do be helpful (or not) to myself and others. Right now, there is confusion about wearing masks and getting vaccinated. My message to myself and others is “Let’s be respectful and kind.”
Find and keep your power! Letting others or circumstances take the lead is like being in a canoe and throwing out your paddle. With a paddle you influence how you take on the river even though you can’t direct the elements of the river like where it goes or how it flows.
Keep your paddle!